Something I’ve been thinking about lately has a lot to do with my mom and her mom. Every day I seem to notice that I am more and more like mom. Once I hit about 16 people stopped being able to tell the difference in us on the phone. I have to tell people I know are calling for her that I am not she. Sometimes the way I catch myself holding my mouth or moving my head or any number of other small things are in a way just like she does. I think like her and I speak like her.
The more I thought about it the more I wondered if mom had these same little epiphanies. Then I realized, her mom died when she was 9. I’m sure she hadn’t spent enough time with her in which she consciously thought about their similarities. So, my mom has no idea what it’s like to turn in to her mom as she gets older. It’s not something where I can say…I really have noticed that I do _______ like you. Was it that way with you and your mom?
This lead me to wonder if I’m so much like her because she’s been a huge part of my life or if it can be blamed on genetics and nature. Maybe my behaviors and manorisms and thought processes are learned. Maybe they’re not. Mom has 3 older sisters. 1 died when she was a teenager, the other 2 have died in the last 10 years. Did my mom learn to be like her mom through them? Does this make me like my grandma who I never knew? It’s something weird to think about. I think I’ll talk to her about it all when we go to Michigan this weekend. It’s so odd to me that there’s something in my life that she can’t understand. Yes, she had Nana who functioned as her mom and did an amazing job taking on 10 kids that weren’t her own. We know nothing else. So, is mom like Nana? Isn’t she still a little like her mom? I hope it’s a really interesting talk. I wonder if she’s ever thought about it.