In one week exactly I will be on an airplane which will be returning me to New York. Jobless and homeless, but returning me none the less. I miss it and I can’t wait. I get there the 15th and have interviews the 16th, 17th, and 18th. Hopefully something will come of them, but I’m really worried that 3 just aren’t enough. Yesterday I spent the better part of the hours going through the redbooks and emailing companies. I made it to “L.” Today I need to finish. My apartment lease will/should start June 1 and I really, really need to have a job by then. I only have so much money. Hell, maybe I’ll just try out for broadway. I can do anything I set my mind to, right? My mom would come see my show!

Anyway, I am super excited about returning to the city and super nervous about the job/money thing. Everyone keeps saying it’ll work out and I’ll be fine, but how can I really know that for sure? Yeah, I’m smart and all, but what if I interview badly? I mean, something has to work out, we can’t all be homeless…I just hate not knowing what it is or how it’s going to work out. I guess that’s where faith in God comes in. I know I’ve gotta trust Him and I know he’ll take care of me, but I want to be able to take care of me. Is that bad?


One response to “

  1. it’s better to want to take care of yourself rather than expecting Him to do it for, even though hoping is a very useful thing.

    i hope i’ll get to live in NY one day. even if it’s for a few days only.

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